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OutFunny!

where the funniest comment wins!

Funniest Users


80
Ron Q. Dandelion
73
El Foosballo
58
Leon S Kennedy
49
PaleoCat
43
BookDirt
40
Mike Hunt
38
Gene Parmesan
23
Robbie Butkovic
21
Phil Mckrackin
15
Courtney Gilmour



Funniest Lines


14
I just hope their harebrained scheme to get Q-Tip's mom to marry Ford's dad works out.
13
The mom was phone.
10
Sanders unsure when the world turned into 'such a fag'.
9
I've tried Shart-Milk. Is that the same thing?
8
It got me interested in what other liquids I might be able to harvest from sea creatures. Next up, the sperm whale!
8
In Soviet Russia, backwards R is triple letter score!
8
Farting in an elevator and then pushing buttons for all floors. Straight to hell for that.
7
As someone in a long-term committed relationship with a sunbeam I don't find this amusing at all.
7
I'll bet even money that tomorrow he's wearing some kind of sombrero.
7
Hitchiker turns the volume down during the sax solo in Pink Floyd's "Money"
7
A soul-searing ironic glare from an underweight hipster
7
It’s important that your child’s name reflects their personality. My son, Saddam Adolf Bin-Stalin, doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer!
6
2 things not generally known about me #1 my dick is the same size as 2 Argos pens end-to-end and #2 im now banned from all Argos stores
6
The old eating Bugles while watching esoteric pornography.
6
Didn't know what "rimjob" meant until now - great little timbit of information.

Ten Urban Legends About Picking Up A Hitchhiker on Halloween

Ten Urban Legends About Picking Up A Hitchhiker on Halloween

1. Hitchhiker turns out to be made of bees, bees fill vehicle, devour driver.

2. Hitchhiker gives driver $5 Harvey's gift car as token of appreciation.

3. Hitchhiker poisons driver, knocks out his teeth, cuts off his fingertips, and steals his identity.

4. Hitchhiker asks for driver's email and sends him annoying forwards for years.

5. Hitchhiker turns out to be Time Traveler from year 2036.

6. Hitchhiker is just a guy whose car broke down who needs a ride to the gas station.

7. Hitchhiker bleeds from the eyes, but acts like everything is cool.

8. Hitchhiker tells long story about why he dropped out of college and why he doesn't believe in formal learning.

9. Hitchhiker telepathically convinces driver to kill his family.

10. Hitchhiker farts like 7 or 8 times.

Can you just gimme a lift to the organic farmer's market? Mwahuhuahahahahha!!!

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JOKE - SCORE: 7

by Leon S Kennedy (58)
Hitchiker turns the volume down during the sax solo in Pink Floyd's "Money"


JOKE - SCORE: 2

by PaleoCat (49)
Hitchhiker has a seemingly endless supply of apples in his backpack and snacks noisily for the entire 4 hour trip


JOKE - SCORE: 2

by Ron Q. Dandelion (80)
Hitchhiker is and 11-foot, bottom-heavy Sandro Lisi. At an Esso station Ford emerges for snacks and handicap bathroom session with Lisi.


JOKE - SCORE: 1

by Gene Parmesan (38)
Hitchhiker scratches his warts with the E-Z pass velcro.


JOKE - SCORE: 2


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