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Man Considers All Movie Snack Bar Patrons 'Pigeons'

Man Considers All Movie Snack Bar Patrons 'Pigeons'

Local web-designer Dave Winwood refuses to pay $5.95 for an extremely large container of "brown sugar water" when he goes to the movies, opting instead to sneak in one, and sometimes up to three cans of Diet Coke from a 12-pack that costs him $2.99. On at least two occasions he has been pressed for time and had to buy the 12-pack right before attending the movies, bringing it in with him in a suspicious-looking Loblaws bag.

"When I see someone shelling out over $12 for some popcorn and pop, I see a pigeon," said Winwood.

Friends report that Winwood used the word "pigeon" at least five times during their last trip to the movies, both in descriptions of Winwood's friends and other snack bar patrons.

At press time Winwood was noisily cracking open a can of D.C., embarrassing all those in his vicinity before taking a long sip and exclaiming, "Ahhh, tastes much better out of the can anyway."

How do you stay refreshed at the movies without being a 'pigeon'?

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JOKE - SCORE: 3

by Leon S Kennedy (58)
Two hip flasks. 1 containing bourbon, the other containing sunflower seeds.


JOKE - SCORE: 2

by El Foosballo (73)
Yo fuck Dave Winwood and his bullshit. Hate that bald soul patch bastard.


JOKE - SCORE: 2

by BookDirt (43)
I keep a pudding cup in my pants at all times.


JOKE - SCORE: 2

by Ron Q. Dandelion (80)
Frequent trips to the water fountain.


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